Tuesday, July 8, 2014

BREAKING THE RULES (Draft 2)

BREAKING THE RULES    
When I tried to go out in our house, I heard my mother shouted at me "Jericho! I said don't try to go outside!" I sit for a while thinking how can i play basketball, but my mother doesn't want me to go. So I think of escaping in our house while my mother doesn't know. I slowly went out in our house,nervously walking out and then run very fast like horse.
             When I got to the basketball court, I saw my friends, then we started playing. That time, I was very happy playing that i didn't considered what my family were thinking of what I’ve done. After playing, I take rest on the bench. I felt like a hammer is bumping on my chest, I was very tired.
             When I was on my way home I was thinking of what would my mom react. As I get inside our house, I feel nervous. When I got inside our house, my mom confronted me and said "Where did you go?" Then i answered "I played basketball". My mom talked to me to settle things.
              That time I realized that I should obey what my family said and told me because it is for my own sake. I should not break any rules.



7 comments:

  1. The description "Run very fast like a horse", I was shocked! Hahaha. Check your tenses. :) Hehe.

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  2. Type your blogs in a proper capitalizations of words :D Do it next time :) <3

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  3. Add more sensory details and figures of speech. Anyway, I like your blog. Keep up the good work! :D

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  5. SHOW not TELL. You must add more sensory details so that your work will be more exciting to read. But I conclude, that you had made a very nice work! Keep it up! :) Also, I'm so happy because you've learned a lesson to that experience. And that lesson will change you to a BETTER PERSON!

    "RULE is RULE" :)

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  6. Use proper capitalization of words. Check the tenses of the words and put the right punctuation marks. =)))

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  7. I like your blog , I'm happy that you learned something from that mistake , Keep it up . :)

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